#4 - The Magic of Play & Intentional Parenting - With Juliana from Stories of Play

Jan 18

Written By Ava

In this guest episode with Juliana from Stories of Play, we chatted about:

The magic of play in learning (for our child) and parenting (for us as mothers)
Her motivation in life, parenting and running a business that is purpose-led
Why she sees motherhood as transformational work, and the two important things that have helped her to face the ups & downs in motherhood

Connect with Juliana at:

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/storiesofplay/
Her Membership - Authentic Learning Experience: https://storiesofplay.lpages.co/tale-membership-waitlist-copy/

Be part of my newsletter community where I share exclusive resources, tips, behind-the-scenes & everything else that goes along with living wholeheartedly and experiencing the magic of peaceful parenting: https://bit.ly/3dux13o

I'll love to know your thoughts about the podcast and this episode. Connect with me on Instagram @thecuriousmomma or write to me at hello@thecuriousmomma.com

Till then, take care and remember - you are enough and keep on making magic in your own unique ways ✨

+ or you can read the transcript by clicking here

You are listening to making mama magic with honest and authentic conversations about all things related to modern motherboards, wholehearted levy and peaceful parenting join me and my guests in our chats about redefining motherhood and parenting in a way that focuses on purpose, peace and presence while pursuing dreams and life, career and business in our unique, magical way I am your host Ava and I empower moms to parent with connection and curiosity and to own their confidence in motherhood.

Hi, welcome to making mama magic in today's absolute we have Juliana or Jules from stories of play and we talked about a lot of things we talk about mainly the magic of play and learning for our child and parenting for us as mothers. We also spoke about her motivation in life parenting and running a business that is purpose led and we talked about also why she sees motherhood as transformational work And also the two important things that has helped her to face the ups and downs in motherhood. I really enjoy speaking between manner on all these topics that I find it so inspiring and ally to what I feel and think as a parent and his mother as well and I hope that you enjoyed this episode. So without further ado please enjoy

Hi welcome to making mama magic podcast, Jules. Thank you for having me, I'm really excited to be here. Thank you for being here. So tell me more about yourself and local soul stories of playing sure my name is jules and I am a homeschooling mom of three. Nearly four as of this recording we live in Melbourne Australia, my husband and I homeschool our kids together from home and we run a business together from home as well. Stories of play and so with stories to play, what we do is we help parents to support their Children in engaging in childhood play and turning those play into learning opportunities. So yeah, that's pretty much what we do in a nutshell. Okay, yeah, great. So what inspired you to start stories of play? The car has been the journey so far in terms of running this business Well, okay, so when I first started stories of play, that was about six years ago now, just after I had my first born child. So basically I started story simply because prior to becoming a mom, I was a preschool teacher and so when I became a mom I decided to resign because we knew that we were going to have our kids close together and we knew were going to homeschool them. So I just didn't see myself being a teacher anymore for the short term or probably in the long term and so I just completely resigned and I was just very excited, so excited to start my journey as a stay at home, homeschooling mama. But what happened was you know, reality set in and I was just completely shocked at how first time motherhood was like for me because as a teacher I thought that I knew it all in terms of raising a child managing kids and everything because I for many years I had a classroom of like 30 kids and I'm very confident kids, but if just so different when it comes to your kids and so when I became a mom, I was just completely thrown into the deep end, so to speak and I was just horrified at how isolating it was for me. And I just felt like I lost a huge part of my identity of who I am. I just didn't know who I was anymore when I was just mom, you know, just constantly doing all the mundane motherhood things. They, they are, I just didn't know who I was anymore. And so I kind of started stories of play and it's just an instagram account, it wasn't a business or anything, I just wanted to start an instagram account where I could do something that was just for myself, you know, the jewels me instead of the mommy I started started to place so that I could connect with people who were along the same journey as me who are probably like moms or teachers or educators or or whatever because I am an extroverted by nature. I'm very sociable. I like to chat. I like to connect with people and so I just felt like you know, social media will give me the opportunity to do that. And so that was in a nutshell house stories of play first started and I guess I called myself or rather to call the account stories to play was because I wanted to share the behind the scenes the stories of place because you know play on its own when you just take a picture and that's especially with instagram being such a visual platform, just a picture alone, you don't even realize all those amazing thing that goes behind one picture or the learning and all that. And so I started that's the the name stories of place so that I can share the behind the scenes of what led to that picture that you see on instagram and so yeah, that's pretty much it and then over the years it just I guess organically grew because I I guess people loved what I was sharing and they started, you know, asking questions and I just started answering questions and just the community grew and grew and grew and then I came to a point where I felt like, hey, you know what, there are just so many people who really could benefit from the things that I'm sharing. There's something that I can offer the world, I can help a lot of parents, a lot of families, a lot of Children to just get back into the wonders of play because I think a lot of us, especially for us asians, we have just completely lost sight of what play is or rather we just never knew that play could be so much more than just lace. So yes, that's a very long winded way of answering your questions. But yeah that tell stories of place started.

Yeah. I mean myself I have witnessed the growth of stories with me for the past three years and I'm really amazed by how much effort and hard work and passion you have put into on sharing your content, sharing your our stories and also being very intentional in terms of adding value to some of the things that you are providing to the community itself has really been a journey that I'm I'm truly impressed as well. Thank you as a mother and also as a business owner now because I've seen how how much effort you've put into really they're putting more moms to enjoy their motherhood better and really enjoy a more abundance motherhood. Yes. Yeah. One of the things that you shared which is about identity. I think a lot of months when they become the first time one right? I mean for me as well I was working full time and one of the things that I struggled the loss is about, I didn't get as well because I felt like I had to be switching like mindset and my rose quite often like I had to be the employee, I had to be like the mom and then I felt like all the time you know the decision making, everything is focus on the child And then when I left my full time work, I became a stay at home run for a while as well. And I felt that sense of extreme isolation as well. So I really resonate with how you feel in terms of lights. It's so different. Right? Used to have cloth interaction with so many people, whether it's people outside or people your committee or your workspace and then suddenly as a stay at home mother, you have this little one who can barely speak. Yeah, exactly. So, so it's really a shift in terms of how life is and, and yes, it can be very mundane sometimes, but there are magical moments as well. So yes, so I guess this it's a huge shift for a lot of marvelous in terms of stepping into that, that mother who Yeah, for sure. Yeah. So for you, it turns off your journey so far starting a business and also being a mother as well. What really motivates you in life in terms of, you know, having this tool rose I think for me, but I believe that we are all called to be on this earth for a purpose. And so I think for me everything I do with with regards to my business with regards to being a mom as well. It's more like what kind of legacy do I want to leave behind right to the world as for my kids as well and not just like a legacy for you know, just you know, my my kids maybe, but really what kind of legacy can I live? Like a long term kind of legacy? Like I guess I'm talking more about like generational impact because you know, let's take for instance with um with kids, right? Like, you know, I'm not just being a mom now, but I'm raising my girls not just to, you know, become the next um whatever career they step into, but they're going to be leaders, they're going to be moms and they're going to be grandmothers in the future as well. And so that kind of like generational impact is what I guess motivates me. And even with the work that I do as well, I'm like so passionate about helping moms to see this immense role that we play as well, and that's why I'm so passionate about playful chocolate, but not just playful chocolate, but the fact that mother who is so powerful, such a transformational role as well for ourselves and for others as well, because we are literally like nurturing life and it goes on and on and on. And my work is to help moms, parents see that they have this ability to not just change their immediate world, their immediate kids world, but then like their Children are going to go forth later to change the world as well. And so I guess from me that kind of long term generational impact is really what motivates me and keeps me going even when you know they are challenging days and everything is in the mundane nous of motherhood and all that in all the boring day to day stuff like I know that it all matters because sometimes you know the things that we do, we can just brush it off and say oh you know this is just mom life or you know I'm just a mom. I hear a lot of my friends who may not have businesses, they might just be health wives at home and they just feel like oh you know I'm not accomplishing much, I'm just a month, I'm just a housewife but no, like I want to change that narrative around that because the role that we play is huge right? And it's honestly generational, the fruits of it, right? The impact of it. We may not even be able to see everything the power and the value of what we do in our in our generation, but it's going to be felt like years and years and years from now and so yeah, that's why I'm super passionate about what I do. Yeah, I love that hard to say because we as parents as moms, we are one of the biggest influences in our Children's life. I think our Children see us as role models and people that they look up to if we have that strong connection born with them and I think for me as well I see mother group as you know really something that is really transformational, I mean intersolv not just the general impact they say, but also in terms of it was showing our true robots we can do as people to impact influence other people as well. So yeah, yeah, so it's something that I feel that it might not be the most exacting work sometimes, but it's important work is valuable work in terms of parenting, international parity and being mindful in terms of how, how we engage our Children, how we connect your Children. And I love that the way that you share about play because like what you say about the asian mindset right? You know like like a lot a lot of Asia in general I would say cease play as you know outside of academics and you know just at the start grid thing as going back to school work has come back to learning to you. How would you define play? That is a very, very difficult question because I can probably speak like ours on this topic. But I think for most of us right for asians right? We come from the background there play is rest time is leisure time, it's time when we relax after we've done the more important work after we've done learning after we've done just all the more important that but the thing is I've come to realize in my professional development because being in Australia we learn something called the play based curriculum where Children are learning to a place and I think for me I began and actually even when I was studying my degree and my Master's here, I just felt like I could not reconcile what I was learning in theory and what I have experienced for myself growing up, I just couldn't understand how play is learning and this is the kind of thing that it's really hard to understand until you actually see for yourself what Children are doing when they play, when you actually begin to take time to notice what you do because if you don't notice right, you really want the the value of the learning and all because often just seems like mess it often just seems like just play. But when you actually take the time to notice to look beyond the mess to look beyond the play, you actually notice that play is learning right? Just because your child is not standing out at the table practicing their writing, tracing, you know, counting numbers and all that does not mean that they are not doing something that is available for their learning for their development and even things, the more academic things like you know, reading writing, there are so many foundational skills that Children need to be developing before they are ready to read to write account and do all those wonderful academic stuff and all that actually begins in play. And so besides academic stuff right Children when they're playing they're also learning not just how learning but they are also learning how to learn. You know those soft skills like you know focus concentration, the ability to think critically to problem solve That kind of soft skills which is not very soft as well because they are so crucial in this new generation of kids that we want to raise as well because honestly if you think about it the kind of jobs that we are trying to prepare our Children, for they will probably not be existing in 20 years time when we become adults right? Like there's every generation the jobs just become obsolete and so how do we prepare them for their future is by helping them to develop all these what we call soft skills and so yes play, it's so incredibly valuable. I cannot even it's really hard for me to just sum it up in a couple of sentences. But yes it is, it is learning, it is spendable, it is just so so powerful if we only can notice what's going on. Yeah. Yeah. And I think one of the things that you're so shared in in your account and also in your courses is about reading as well as about not just reading but also hispanic, intentional time reading as well, these are moments and not just just pure really is about learning together as well and it's not just you know telling or is reading with the Children. Remember there's this book that you shared in the course I attended the authentic learning called the chicka chicka boom boom. Yeah my boy loves it. He's he's like a fan of this book when I started reading with him like one year plus ago when I told the cause and I recall he was able to you know articulate yet he was only like to be near to thereabouts and then like now he reads the book he can literally like say with me very clearly as well so and he actually learned his alphabet from that as well. Yeah, which is something that was amazing. Yeah, it's always it's such a fun book to read with him. But I mean even my husband loves to read him. So it's there's a lot of reading, there's a lot of involvement and that's the fun part of reading as well. It's not just like just boring reading but just there's a lot of fun. There's a lot of play, there's a lot of play of population as well. So I think shifting mindsets about play right? This this could be one of the playful Wilbur's that we can do with parents but also play lighters of looking out for others, learning moments from death as well. Yeah, for sure. Yeah, in your own work you have interacted with a lot of moms right? And you mentioned that a lot of moms feel that they are not enough They feel that they are just a mom at all. How do you think loves in this modern age care, enjoy parenting and also motherhood better. I think a lot of it again comes to our own experience as well. We bring a lot of how we parent based on how we were parented growing up. Right. And so like, I guess a lot of us when we were growing up right, my parents hardly played with us like play was always seemed like a activity that Children do. And the thing is because as we progressed, a society progress, you know, with research and all that done right, we begin to learn things that our previous generations who came before us, they didn't know about the value of play. They didn't know that play has so much value. They didn't know about the importance of you know, connecting with our Children and all that kind of thing. And so when you don't know it's hard to do things. But the thing is once you are actually open to learning in things, once you are open to reading up getting knowledge for yourself, you begin to open up your mind to see that hey, you know things are changing. These are considered as important and this is valuable and the thing is once, you know, you can do better and that's why knowledge is so powerful and I often believe in the importance of educating ourselves as well, like constantly learning once we become lifelong learners ourselves constantly learning about different things then we can pass on that love of learning to our kids as well. And so I think for us a lot of times we were raised with the mindset that oh you know, you need to work if you play with your child, you're a lazy parent if your child is in a mess. I remember even for myself when I first became a mom and my parents came to visit me the very first time in Australia and I would spend like my free time creating, um, like our plaintext dolls and things like that and my dad is a doer, His love language is acts of service, right? And so for him as a parent to show love to your kids, you need to keep the house clean, you need to be cooking, you need to be making sure that everything is *** and span and just basically a lot of doing right. And so I was kind of doing as well, but I was playing for my dad right? And so when he saw me then I remember there was one, he just said that, hey, why don't you just go and mop the floor or something like that. And it was only because he, he didn't no matter right, it was an old mindset of thinking where where play is not valuable and all that, he didn't know the value of it. But it's so different after so many years now with me almost having my fork hit both, my parents are here now and my house is way messier than like six years ago when I had my first born right with three kids all the time, who are much older and cutting pieces of paper everywhere. The house is just insanely messy all the time and my dad is just, he's not so much fussed about all those things anymore because over the years he's come to realize as well that it's not just mess, you know my girls are learning and and he can see it for himself at all also because I tell them, I tell them all the things that my kids are doing, but he is learning, he is, he is beginning to see the value of play and he's not so I guess bothered before because he now has this renewed way of thinking about the importance of connecting with Children that wanted to play and looking beyond the mess and all that kind of thing, right? And so what I often tell parents is when you cannot reconcile this feeling of if I am playing my child, I'm lazy or if I'm not doing certain things right, we need to really ask ourselves the hard questions like where is all this coming from? Like is it is it from our own experiences, is there something that we need to unlearn is there something that we need to read up to find the value of? Because once we are very certain of our why once we're confident about our, why once we are confident about equipping ourselves with knowledge because knowledge is power. That's when we are able to be confident and intentional about the things that we do and don't do and so that really helps with that whole mindset, so to speak, right? And um yeah, I think one more thing for me is also parents often feel like there's a lot of shoots and I really hate that, you know when, when parents or moms in particular feel like there's something that I should do, you know, I should stick and play, I shouldn't sit and play in a lot of the courses and programs that I do that often are two camps of parents, parents who feel like they should play and then there are parents who feel like they shouldn't play because if they play with the kids all the time when they are not setting their Children up for independence and all that kind of thing. I think there's a lot of all these, I guess baggage is weighing on us and not just to play, but in every aspect of parenting, you know how much sleep my child should get, how much screen time my child needs, how much um food, what kind of food and should I breastfeed and like there's just so much shoot just going around parenting, and I really hate that because it gives us unnecessary pressure to do the right thing, but the thing is there is no right thing, I often believe that what you need to do is to read out to equip yourself with with knowledge, right, and then knowing that right, cross reference with your own personal values of what you want for your family, for your child, and then you can make that decision and that is going to look completely different for every single family because every single family is different, every family circumstances believe values and what they prioritize is going to be different. Yes, definitely, I so agree with you that because I mean for me, because of the journey that have gone through eight hours of like learning and unlearning and reflecting as well, I see that it makes a lot of intentional understanding of who I am as a person, what what kind of family and values and priorities do I have as in terms of making informed choices that align to all this, and I think the thing about being a mom, we get a lot of foul weather, is it so many solid unsolicited advice, Yes, different people from well intended friends and yeah, so so they have good intentions, right, but ultimately out boys and so what works best for myself as a farm and also as a family and also with our Children, because I'm maturing is different, right? They what they do, what they love, what what makes them tick, what makes them last, What works for a child at the same age for other families may not be the same as our own Children because they're so unique in terms of they are person at the interests and all. Yeah, there's a lot of things that we may not know about. The other family that we see on social media is perfectly curated versus our own journey person. Yeah. So I think I really resonate with what you say about having that clarity of what we believe in the morning value as a person as a family. I think that will definitely help modest to be less stress and just let go of all the shoots, the baggage journalists. Um, the past childhood experiences that may not be the most aligned to what you believe now as a person and now as a mother, which is a new identity and also as a wife as well, right? Because that's the way things that has changed since then, since a child as well. Yeah, So definitely it's something that hopefully more mothers can understand and embrace that mindset. Yeah. I think there's one more thing I know that I wanted to add about grace as well. Like I think moms were often very hard on ourselves and the thing is as much as what we know better. We do better. That kind of, that kind of thing, right? That kind of, um, yeah, that kind of language that we talked about. But the thing is with unlearning and relearning things is always going to be a lifelong process. We're never going to become perfect at understanding stuff. Some things, you know, like if we never, you know, understood the importance of place, we've never understood things like positive parenting, intentional parenting, mindful parenting, all this type of lingual out there now that we need to unlearn and relearn how we discipline our kids and all that kind of thing. The thing is because it's so different from how we experience it over and over again. Even as we try to do what we think is now the best thing for our kids. We're often going to sometimes occasionally because we're only human right? Whether we have our own triggers, whether we have our own limitations and all that as well, we need to understand that it's going to be a lifelong journey of personal growth for us as well to reach a point where, you know, I have unlimited patients. Like hold on, we're going to have unlimited patients. Yeah, Exactly. Right. And so we need to understand that as much as once we know better, we do better. We also need to understand that we need to give ourselves grace to fail to show our Children what it's like to fail as well and to be okay with failing and to say, you know what mommy has has sheltered to you again today or whatever, right? Whatever that you don't want to do and telling them that, hey, it's okay. We will fail and we will pick ourselves up as well. Try this again tomorrow and so Yes, yeah, yeah. I love that you say about grace and I think like having the grace and self compassion for ourselves and have compassion. Yes, really, really critical because like want to say we are not like 100% all the time when we cannot be like an energizer bunny who has like 100% factory quality tax, but there'll be bad days that you know, we just can't be the best version that we are. And I love that how you say about modeling that you know that we are in that space of not the best mood and really showing that emotion and being very authentic about that as well. I think they will learn that mama or papa, it's their human as well, right? We have our own emotions that we have our good days and bad days and likewise for us, we see our Children as they have good days and bad days as well. But as a family, we support each other. We know that we are there for each other and yes, we grow from the experience together. Yeah. Okay, so if you were to choose one word that could describe your almost six years motherhood journey. Yeah. What's the word that you chose to describe motherhood journey so far? Um I think it would definitely be humbling, especially coming from a teacher like I mentioned earlier, right? Someone who thought I knew a lot when it came to raising kids to looking at the kids, right? Just being a mother, just really shows you how much you don't know. And even coming to my fourth child now, there will be some experience for sure that I can draw on from raising three other girls already. But even though this is like my fourth girl, right, still a girl, it's still parenting, this particular child that is coming right for the very first time, there's going to be things that I don't know because she's going to be completely different to her older sisters. And so, you know, motherhood just shows me that I will never reach a point of time where I know it all, I do it all and I'm able to do everything I want to show my girls and show others as well that there is beauty in and this comfort and peace in knowing that I do not have to know it all. Even as a mom of almost four, I can continue learning, I can continue growing. There's always going to be something new to learn about my girls every single day. There's always going to be something new. A new parenting had a new parenting trick that I don't know, right? Yeah. And and so yeah, it just really shows me every single day how humbling this motherhood journey is because even as I'm a mom and I think my mom mothering me now like here as well, it's just so crazy because you know, this motherhood journey never ends, you know, you think that once your child becomes a mom you kind of like hands off, No, like she's just learning how to be a mom in a different way, how to be a mom of a mom, you know, kind of thing and just so so beautiful to watch this new season grow and evolve for each of us in different stages of our motherhood journey and so yeah, I actually find it so comforting to know that, you know, I never have to reach a point where I can I can do everything perfectly, I can do everything well, I'm like this perfect model or like in this unicorn person, but like just knowing that I give myself grace to give myself the grace to continue learning and it's very empowering actually, so it's like humbling and empowering, like mother being a mother just makes me feel so strong and so, so, so vulnerable, so humbling. Like there's just all these emotions all come together in this perfect package of magic in the mundane. I don't know, I just love, I just love that that that phrase, like it's just something that I often remind myself all the time that mother who is just so um yeah, there's just so much going on and it's everything is like a paradox and so yeah, I love it. I love it so much and it's hard, it's hard work for sure. I'm sure every single mom listening will agree with you, but it's just so worth it and so valuable as well. Yeah, I love that magic in the mundane thing. I think that's one of the things that, oh, I mean this podcast called making Mama Magic, right? So I also believe that every moms have their own way of making magic, whether you're my working mother, whether you're a business owner, whether you're a stay at home mothers, but the way that you choose a parent and you choose to spend time with your child in the, in the following ways. And then the way that you choose your own, you know, life goals and priorities and, and things that you're doing for Children. You are making magic in your own unique way. It's not like the same as other families, but you choose your own journey, your path. And it will be a challenging journey for a lot of mothers. It will be a journey where we learned a lot of things that we learned a lot of things, but it's your own unique way. So that's how the making our magic came about as well. So good if people would like to connect you, how can they connect you the best place would be on instagram. That's where I guess I show up most for my community. So I'm on stories of play, just one word. Sorry to play. And yeah, that's, that's where I love to have a chat with parents in D. M. That's my favorite part of just doing what I do. Like just making real life connections with just hundreds and hundreds of like moms out there and just hearing stories, sharing stories, exchanging stories and encouraging each other. Because my biggest passion is really for moms to see that they are not alone on this journey because we started at the start of this interview talking about how I felt so isolated and I realized that I wasn't the only one feeling isolated. Like moms all over the world are feeling isolated and when we can start to have conversations right? We begin to empower each other to see that Hey, I'm not the only one feeling this Youtube right? And that is so powerful in knowing that you know, even though we feel alone, we are really not alone. And so yeah, I truly enjoy that part of what I do, disconnect things. Lungs Yeah. And you do have a membership community as well learning experience. Yes. Yes. So I have a place parenting membership called the authentic learning experience. We only open three times a year. We welcome new parents into our beautiful community where we just talked about playing what our Children are learning when they play, how to help our Children to learn automatically without burning out at both ends because I know sometimes in our eagerness to help our Children learn, we just want to do all the things, create all the activities and so because my passion is to help parents see um playful, get get Children who have a playful childhood, but more importantly to get parents moms to have that whole abundant mother food as well and that's what we do inside of the authentic learning experience. Sounds wonderful, thank you so much for telling jules and all the best for your upcoming folks girl coming out in a very, very, very, very soon. I don't even know when it could be any type and yeah, wishing you a smooth delivery and all the best to you, thank you very much. Thank you for having me. So that was my conversation with Julian. I really enjoyed it. I love that we talked about the mindsets that has helped her to embrace the apps and flows of motherhood, particularly about match in the monday and also in terms of looking at motherhood as a journey where we learn and we learn about our own experiences about our own beliefs and values and I really, really, I truly believe that once we get clarity about who we are and what we believe in and what works best for our child ourselves and our own families. We will be able to own our confidence in parenting and motherhood. And that's something that I work with my coaching clients, often as well, juliana has given birth to her beautiful girl since our recording. Congratulations Julieta. If you'd like to collect her, I have put in her website and instagram wings in the show notes. So feel free to check out her instagram and website. If you'd like to learn the magic of play in your own parenting journey. If you'd like to further the conversation with me to connect with me at instagram at the curious mama or subscribe to my newsletter where I will share a bit more about resources relating to this topic as well. And if we would like to show your love for this podcast, please leave a rating on apple podcasts. This will really mean a lot to me to then take care and remember that you are enough and keep on making magic in your unique way.

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